Trust is the Key

Love is something you can’t control. It’s something that happens to you unconsciously. It may start with one hello, and sometimes it ends with a sad goodbye.

Some relationships last in two people working on their relationship and make it worthwhile. While some relationships are hopeless. Hopeless in a way that you have to let go because no matter how hard you try to be the best man out of yourself, it just doesn’t work. If something doesn’t seem right to both of you, you may want to take time to talk about it. You know, some things may be fixed with the help of simple and sincere words during a one-on-one talk with your partner. But my friend, when you feel like it wont work, if you are like me who I think did all the possible remedies I can use, please don’t be too blind or dumb to think that sooner or later it will be fixed. “It’s okay he/she will be a better person when we get married.” No. It becomes worse. Forgive me. Going back to my ex, when we were still together for 6 months, we fight but then it’s not for long. A year later, the situation gets worse, our fights became unhealthy for a relationship. We’re not even married but we fight like we are.

Now we’re talking about marriage. Sorry this is far from our problems when we were still together. But let me tackle this one, as this will also be helpful in decision-making. Liz, how do you know these things when you’re still single? – it’s a personal experience. I’m surrounded with couples who are not happily married because of their false beliefs even before their marriage. My grandma and one of my aunts told me when I was still young, “yes you may love someone dearly, but marriage is committment and a lifetime journey. Marriage comes with responsibilities, for a normal couple you have to be a good example to your kids and you must raise them well, the way your kids are reflects who you are as a parent. To make it short, never marry someone when you are not yet ready to take the hardships as the other half of your love and as a parent to your future kids.

Now back to the things that broke my heart to pieces. Honestly, I gave my best to the one I loved, but you can’t be loved in return when she doesn’t even know you so well and your efforts just to make her feel loved. For a person with financial problems, you will know what I mean. She may say “I love you,” but she may not mean it, honestly, and then she goes back to her phone, chatting to her friends or posting a selfie on her fb, while you are just there hanging.

What’s more? Now girls, I have a question for you. Is it necessary to check your partner’s phone all the time to make sure that he’s not cheating on you? Now maybe this wont be annoying on my part if I’m in a new relationship. But this is so annoying when you’re together for almost two years.

MY POINT: two years is long enough to get to know a person, especially if this person is your partner. You get to know who he/she is for that long, and if you see each other for almost everyday, checking our phones to see if we’re cheating is a damn turn off. I was not afraid to let my partner see my phone, at least I was loyal to her. But this makes me feel like “hey do i look like a liar to you? why don’t you believe me when I say you’re the only one I call or text everyday? (Honestly, my phone is idle to other contacts and i’m such a lonely person because she’s the only one I call or text) Perhaps you’re doing these things while I am away because you think I wont be suspicious.” I’m not the kind of person who checks my partner’s phone for a possible third party. LOL I admit I’m too innocent to do that. I just wait until I suddenly discover something, then maybe give her a chance to explain. But baby, you better prepare a believable reason because if not, I don’t think you’ll see me after that. So girls, be careful and don’t be too suspicious. The man you have right now may be descent and loyal to you, but you may lose him in less than a minute because of this annoying act. Please. If you believe in him, trust him.

One last thing, please be sensitive enough to know how he feels. We may be smiling, but deep inside we’re hiding something that breaks us. We just keep quiet because we want you to start the conversation. We don’t want our couples to get hurt, and a soft voice of a caring partner will open our hearts to talk the thing that bothers us. It always feels better when we know that someone cares for us. You may not be able to resolve the problem, but the fact that you tried to talk things out is already a big thing. Plus, everything seems to be alright when we’re hugged by our partner (but not too tight). For me it would be easier to open up, and crying in front of her was never a hesitation because I know someone understands me. I object to the others’ opinion that doing these things is just spoiling your partner and making us feel like a baby. No. This is just one way of cheering up your partner and make him feel better.

And wow.. At this very point, I think I’m getting calm and relaxed because I was able to point out the things that should have happened when we were still together. But it’s also a fact that you can no longer get back to those times. I expected these things from her (my mistake~), but never did I felt anything like that. So it’s better to move on. Baby, I mean Miss A, I’m sorry.. I know you also did your best to save the relationship, but it came to an end. I hope I also made you happy and loved, let you know that I my feelings were real. Thank you and I wish you happiness.

I’m sorry if I seem bitter and overacting but this is already the nth time I posted something about my wasted lovelife. Forgive me I’m not giving my blog the good vibes this time but don’t you worry, I’m just doing this for you to learn from my mistakes as a hopeless romantic who was hoping for a happy ending. Perhaps my relationship was not a good one, but I’m still hoping that i will meet that girl, the one that I’ve been dreaming of; at the right place, at the right time. I still have a lot to learn, and this would be the start of a new beginning.

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